Are You Optimistic?

Recently I was giving Harrison feedback (the predictive selection and development assessment I use). I shared the feedback with the client that their Harrison indicated they had a tendency toward optimism. They said, “I think that’s true, I am usually positive and happy.” There are many who believe positive and happy is optimistic. While optimists […]

Are You Playing To Win Or Playing Not To Lose?

In many ways, we have let the pendulum swing too far in the “can’t we all get along” direction. While I think it’s a good idea to look out for each other and to live in alignment with our values I think it’s not a good idea to play things too conservatively. The papers this […]

Are You Kidding Me?

If you have been reading this blog for any time at all, you know I think that a constant need to feel comfortable limits our potential and the results we create. Every major or minor accomplishment that has meant anything to you in your life has required that you work through discomfort. Yet for some […]

Have You Ever Gotten Really Good Bad News?

2014 was (to put it mildly) a very difficult year. Then, in January 2015, I got a call sharing some bad news. It struck me how relieved I was to hear this bad news. When I thought about why I felt so relieved I realized that, compared to the news I actually expected and was […]

How Effective Are You At Handling Change?

“Change is difficult” may be one of the biggest lies people buy. If you won 100 million dollars in the lottery, your life would probably change, and you probably wouldn’t find that change difficult. Change is only difficult when you believe that the change is going to produce negative or undesirable results. “People are afraid […]

Can You Admit When You Are Wrong or Don’t Know What You Are Doing?

I had an issue with my new laptop. I accessed the Dell customer service chat feature only to be told 10 minutes into the chat that my problem had to be handled by a live person and should only take 10 minutes. I called. I was rerouted to the Philippines. The gentleman was nice and […]

Are You Playing to Win or Are You Playing Not to Lose?

In many ways we have let the pendulum swing too far in the “can’t-we-all-get-along” direction. While I think it is a good idea to look out for each other and to live in alignment with our values, I think it’s not a good idea to play things too conservatively. The papers this week have been […]

How Realistic Are You?

As most of you know, I returned from riding my Harley around the perimeter of the USA on Labor Day weekend. It was a 40 day adventure that’s hard to put into words. I was asked many questions during the 6 weeks, but the one that was the most interesting was, “How can you just […]

Is Your Life About Transition or Transformation?

You and I experience about 20,000 moments a day. Negative, positive, or neutral, they are moments nonetheless. Many of those moments result in change–change in thought, change of plans, change of attitude, etc. My questions for you this month are: Are the changes that happen in your life and work simply transitions, or are they […]

How Do You Deal With Challenging People?

Last week I was asked by a coaching client to help her deal with a direct report who was challenging to her. The direct report kept sticking her nose into things that were none of her business. This nosiness was not only distracting and annoying, but it took focus off the work that needed to […]

How Effective Are You At Graduations?

Maxx, my step son, just graduated from High School on Saturday. Last week we spent 2.5 days at his college orientation at The University of Central Florida (GO KNIGHTS). During the orientation, there was a presenter who talked about staying connected and letting go in your relationship with the student. As I was listening, it […]

Obstacles or Opportuntieis? Where is Your Focus

We live in a real world with real problems that are really challenging. It is foolish to attempt to dilute that reality with cheesy clichés or platitudes. The fact is, Nietzsche was wrong: it is not always true that “what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.” It is not always true that “every cloud has […]

Are You Smarter Than A Sea Turtle?

I was snorkeling yesterday off Maui. Once the initial part of the adventure was complete, the captain of our boat said we were going to pull anchor and go look for sea turtles to dive with. That’s exactly what we did. When I got back on the boat, the first mate asked us some sea […]

What Do You Think About When Times Are Tough?

Every day we are faced with challenges in our personal and professional lives. These challenges are sometimes controllable but often are not. The fact is we are either dealing with a difficult issue now, or are about to, or have just finished dealing with one. Now, don’t you feel better? The key to success has […]

Do You Know the Difference Between Your Gut and Your Guilt?

I was having a conversation with a friend the other day who was working through a challenge. During the conversation they kept saying that their gut was telling them to do ‘X’. I stopped them mid-sentence the next time they went down that road and said, “Is that your gut or your guilt?” Turns out […]

Do You Learn or Do You Just Notice?

Every day, we are faced with opportunities to learn or just notice. I was recently speaking with a client; talking about how many times some people must go through the same thing over and over again before they really learn. And sometimes even then they don’t learn. The difference between learning and noticing comes in […]

How Do You Make Sense of the Senseless?

I waited a long time this month to write this newsletter. I was very ambivalent about what to share with you. Now I am clear. I found myself watching the Today show this morning with shock and sadness as student after student recalled the tragic events on the Virginia Tech campus. Reggie, my business partner, […]

How Do You Deal with Change?

Many have said, “Change is difficult.” Here is something I want everyone to remember: Change is NOT difficult…unless and until we equate change with something dangerous or bad. Once your mind is convinced that it is going to be bad or dangerous, your brain literally triggers an alarm that causes you to repel the thought […]

Are You Hesitant to Make a Change?

This morning I read a quote: “That which we settle for takes up space for what we really want in life.” Pretty powerful, right? When we resist change, it is usually because of fear. Fear and anxiety are ALWAYS created because our minds create a scary story about ‘THE FUTURE’. Contrary to popular opinion, we […]

When Was The Last Time You Did Something For The First Time?

I was attending and speaking at a conference last week. In one particular session I was privileged to be able to participate as opposed to present. I was seated at a round table with several talented people. The facilitator asked us to participate in a best practices exercise where we were charged with identifying different […]