Hi, everybody. I’m Mike Staver. This is Mondays with Mike, a weekly video series where I answer questions from people just like you. Here’s this week’s question.

“I was watching a video recently and the speaker said that most of the angst we cause ourselves is the result of the stories we tell ourselves. Do you believe this is true? And if you would, would you speak to more of that?”

Look, I 100% believe that the angst and the joy that we cause ourselves is 100% related to the stories we tell ourselves. You see, all of us accumulate certain evidence and certain factual data in our life every day. And as a function of that, we create stories. Now, sometimes those stories are fiction and sometimes they’re nonfiction. And so what you have to do is look at the evidence that it’s true.

Have you ever had a situation where you’re absolutely sure you were right? You absolutely sure you knew what was going on? Only to find out later you weren’t even close to being sure what was going on. So what I want you to realize and think about is that the stories we tell ourselves create the emotions that we experience. Those emotions create impulses. Those impulses lead us to act or not act on something, and that action results in some type of consequence.

So, yes, be very mindful of your stories. Pay attention to your stories and challenge your stories on a fact based. Because sometimes we believe things that just feel that way, even though they’re not that way. I’m a big believer that if you manage the stories you tell yourself, you’ll manage your emotions, manage your behavior and manage your outcomes. If you don’t manage those stories, our brain is like a spoiled little kid. It’s going to run away with you and do a lot of things that can sometimes create emotions that aren’t particularly helpful.

I hope that’s helpful!

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