Maxx, my step son, just graduated from High School on Saturday. Last week we spent 2.5 days at his college orientation at The University of Central Florida (GO KNIGHTS). During the orientation, there was a presenter who talked about staying connected and letting go in your relationship with the student. As I was listening, it occurred to me that his points apply to everyone – not just those with kids going away to college or into the workforce.
So my question for you this month is, how well do you connect and let go? The important word in that sentence is AND. Professional and personal maturity is about being able to do both effectively.
How well do you let go of attempts to control others’ choices? How well do you reject inappropriate behavior while at the same time stay connected to the person? Are you able to disagree, correct and set boundaries without making the person feel bad?
Here are some suggestions:
1. Identify those people or areas where you may be holding on too tight! If you aren’t sure, ask someone. Or if that doesn’t work, notice them turning blue from the stranglehold.
2. Identify those people or areas where you need to deepen the connection. It might be a person even yourself. It might be a reconnection to your work. It’s about saying no to the right things and yes to the right things.
3. Fully examine your motives and subject yourself to a person’s feedback and observations about where you need to let go and where you need to connect.