Do you have regrets?


Hi, everybody. I’m Mike Staver. This is Mondays with Mike, a weekly video series where I answer questions for people just like you. Here’s this week’s question.

“I often hear people say they have no regrets. That statement makes me wonder if I am somehow unusual because I have many regrets. I’m not depressed or bitter about it, but I think life well lived involves risk and failure and making terrible decisions. What are your thoughts about that statement?”

I think you just said it. I totally agree. Right?

Crew: 100%

Mike: If you’re not living on the edge, if you aren’t running into some buzzsaws, if you aren’t doing something you regret, I don’t think you’re taking a big enough– I’m not going to judge you. For me, I’m not living big enough. I’m with you. Whoever you are, I don’t see your name here, whoever you are, I got regrets. I got a wheelbarrow full of regrets. Are you kidding me?

But, it’s what I do with the regrets. It’s the extent to which I take that regret and go, “What did I learn from that? What can I do next?” If I haven’t failed significantly at points in my life, I start really wondering, “Am I living large enough?” This broken arm and plates in my arm are good reason for that. We’re not going to talk about that.

All right, go for it, live large, stay within your ethical, moral, and value-based boundaries. I think you should have some regrets. I’m not judging those of you who walk around saying you don’t have any. Good for you. That’s the way you choose to live your life, then live your life that way. I can tell you this, for me, in my house, living large enough to have a few regrets feels like a life well lived. Feels like, “I like the scars, I like the bruises, I like the bumps.” I think they’re important to building character.

That’s Mondays with Mike. I hope that was helpful. Be courageous. Till next time.

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