Why Are Some Vacations Not Relaxing?


Hi, everybody. I’m Mike Staver. This is Mondays with Mike, a weekly video series where I answer questions from people just like you. Here’s this week’s question.

“Why is it that vacations are sometimes not restful or relaxing?”

As I am shooting this right now, I’m just back from vacation. It was extremely relaxing. Looked very much like that actually. I was in Maui. Look at that. That’s an awesome beach, isn’t it? That’s a beach.

By the way. A couple of you have been making some comments about my– You notice Fiji’s back. We were with Vos for a while. We had Vos bottles on the table. Now we have Fiji. I haven’t heard from Fiji, still don’t have a sponsor. What are you going to do? Fiji, if you’re watching, I’m not asking for a lot, just some love, maybe a lifetime supply of Fiji. Wouldn’t be bad.

Here’s why vacations are sometimes not restful or relaxing because they’re not really vacations. They’re just the same old, same old in a different location. Remember a location is not a vacation. A vacation is what you do mentally, spiritually, and physically. Let me give you an example. My vacation was in Maui and sometimes I’ve gone to Maui a lot and sometimes I’d go to Maui and be busy all the time, but this time made a commitment to just being still, just you know what not feeling like I got to get up and be on the run, go see some sites, just chill. It took me about 48 hours, 24 to 48 hours to really get in the feel of the island. I know the island so well that it feels like being home. It was great, but what I had to do most importantly was put my brain on vacation because just because my body is in the mountains or at the beach or in the country or in the desert or wherever it is you go to vacation does not necessarily mean that your brain’s there.

You can’t turn your brain off, but you can focus your brain. You can focus your brain on just being fully present in the space that you’re in. That means in my case, hearing the ocean, smelling the salt, being slower, literally slowing down. I tend to move pretty fast through my day. I slow everything down. Your brain has to be told it’s on vacation and the way your brain’s told it’s on vacation is by slowing down and getting it to focus on something other than the thing. That’s very important.

The reason you’re not restful or relaxing sometimes is because you’re not really have your brain on vacation and you don’t slow down. When I get on the airplane yesterday flying here actually, I flew Hawaiian Airlines from Maui and I’m going to fly Hawaiian Airlines more often actually. They play Hawaiian music, they gave you little slices of ice-cold pineapple for the snack on the plane, and I realized that usually when I come back, the minute I get on the plane, I’m starting to feel stressed, but I didn’t. Reentry’s important as well.

The other reason people don’t rest or relax on vacation is sometimes the people they go with. I saw some families, man. They were not happy together. You know what, be careful who you vacation with. Don’t feel like you have to vacation with somebody that makes you crazy because that ain’t going to be a great vacation. It sounds good when you’re sitting at home planning it, but man, it could be rough if you don’t really love and enjoy the people you’re with. Hope that’s helpful.

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