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Do you learn or do you just notice?
Every day, we are faced with opportunities to learn or just notice. I was recently speaking with a client; talking about how many times some people must go through the same thing over and over again before they really learn. And sometimes even then they don’t learn. The difference between learning and noticing comes in…
Do you know the difference between your gut and your guilt?
I was having a conversation with a friend the other day who was working through a challenge. During the conversation they kept saying that their gut was telling them to do ‘X’. I stopped them mid-sentence the next time they went down that road and said, “Is that your gut or your guilt?” Turns out…
What do you think about when times are tough?
Every day we are faced with challenges in our personal and professional lives. These challenges are sometimes controllable but often are not. The fact is we are either dealing with a difficult issue now, or are about to, or have just finished dealing with one. Now, don’t you feel better? The key to success has…
Are you smarter than a sea turtle?
I was snorkeling yesterday off Maui. Once the initial part of the adventure was complete, the captain of our boat said we were going to pull anchor and go look for sea turtles to dive with. That’s exactly what we did. When I got back on the boat, the first mate asked us some sea…
Obstacles or opportunities? Where is your focus?
We live in a real world with real problems that are really challenging. It is foolish to attempt to dilute that reality with cheesy clichés or platitudes. The fact is, Nietzsche was wrong: it is not always true that “what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.” It is not always true that “every cloud has…
How effective are you at graduations?
Maxx, my step son, just graduated from High School on Saturday. Last week we spent 2.5 days at his college orientation at The University of Central Florida (GO KNIGHTS). During the orientation, there was a presenter who talked about staying connected and letting go in your relationship with the student. As I was listening, it…
How do you deal with challenging people?
Last week I was asked by a coaching client to help her deal with a direct report who was challenging to her. The direct report kept sticking her nose into things that were none of her business. This nosiness was not only distracting and annoying, but it took focus off the work that needed to…
Is your life about transition or transformation?
You and I experience about 20,000 moments a day. Negative, positive, or neutral, they are moments nonetheless. Many of those moments result in change–change in thought, change of plans, change of attitude, etc. My questions for you this month are: Are the changes that happen in your life and work simply transitions, or are they…
How realistic are you?
As most of you know, I returned from riding my Harley around the perimeter of the USA on Labor Day weekend. It was a 40 day adventure that’s hard to put into words. I was asked many questions during the 6 weeks, but the one that was the most interesting was, “How can you just…
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MONDAYS WITH MIKE POST ARCHIVE
How to Hold People Accountable Without Micromanaging
” allowfullscreen=”allowfullscreen”> Episode Summary In this episode of Mondays with Mike, host Mike Staver addresses a common leadership challenge: what’s the best way to hold someone accountable without resorting to micromanagement? Drawing from his coaching expertise, Mike explains that true accountability is not about enforcement or constant checking in; rather, it’s about clear expectations…
How to Handle People With Low Emotional Intelligence
” allowfullscreen=”allowfullscreen”> Episode Summary In this episode of Mondays with Mike, Mike Staver addresses a practical and common leadership challenge: how to deal with individuals who demonstrate low emotional intelligence. Mike explains that the first step is to identify the specific area in which emotional intelligence is lacking—whether it is self-awareness or social awareness.…
How to Give Feedback That Motivates
” allowfullscreen=”allowfullscreen”> Episode Summary In this episode of Mondays with Mike, Mike Staver addresses the challenge of giving feedback that motivates teams rather than deflating them. He offers practical advice on how leaders can structure their feedback conversations to inspire and energize their teams, particularly when discussing areas that need improvement. Mike suggests that…
Leading Teams That Do Not Listen
” allowfullscreen=”allowfullscreen”> Episode Summary In this episode of Mondays with Mike, host Mike Staver responds to a common leadership dilemma: what to do when a leader feels their team just doesn’t listen. Mike re-frames the issue, suggesting that communication breakdowns are often driven by lack of clarity rather than unwillingness to listen. He highlights…
Are There Uncoachable People?
” allowfullscreen=”allowfullscreen”> Episode Summary In this episode of Mondays with Mike, host Mike Staver addresses a direct and often debated question: “Is there such thing as an un-coachable person?” Drawing from his experience as an executive coach, Mike explains that un-coachable individuals do exist, and he defines clear signs that indicate someone may not…
How to Help Leaders Shift From Reactive to Proactive
” allowfullscreen=”allowfullscreen”> Episode Summary In this episode of Mondays with Mike, host Mike Staver explores a fundamental leadership challenge: how to help someone shift from a reactive mindset to a proactive one. Mike responds to a listener’s question by breaking down practical strategies for fostering proactive thinking, both for individuals and within organizations. Drawing…
How to Help a Client Improve Self-Awareness
” allowfullscreen=”allowfullscreen”> Episode Summary In this episode of Mondays with Mike, host Mike Staver explores the delicate process of guiding someone to the realization that their actions, not their character, may be causing problems. Drawing on his coaching experience, Mike explains why it’s crucial to uncouple a person’s behavior from their identity. Rather than…
How to Address Toxic Behavior in a Defensive Employee
” allowfullscreen=”allowfullscreen”> Episode Summary In this episode of Mondays with Mike, host Mike Staver addresses a common leadership dilemma: how to confront toxic behavior without triggering defensiveness. Drawing from his personal experience working with defensive individuals, Mike Staver shares the practical techniques he’s found most helpful—while acknowledging that no approach is foolproof. He emphasizes…
How to Use Questions to Diffuse Tension in a Meeting
” allowfullscreen=”allowfullscreen”> Episode Summary In this episode of Mondays with Mike, host Mike Staver delves into the art of defusing tension during meetings—a critical leadership skill for maintaining a constructive environment and fostering effective collaboration. Responding to a viewer’s question about coaching techniques to ease tense situations, Mike stresses the first essential step: acknowledging the tension in…
How to Set Boundaries Without Guilt
” allowfullscreen=”allowfullscreen”> Episode Summary In this episode of Mondays with Mike, host Mike Staver addresses a common personal development question: “How do I set boundaries without feeling guilty?” Drawing from his coaching expertise, Mike Staver explains that guilt stems from the belief that you’ve done something wrong, whereas shame comes from believing you are bad. He emphasizes…
How to Help a Coaching Client Identify Their True Priorities
” allowfullscreen=”allowfullscreen”> Episode Summary In this episode of Mondays with Mike, host Mike Staver answers the question: How do I help someone identify their true priorities? Drawing on his experience as a coach, Mike Staver discusses the foundational steps to guiding individuals, whether personally or within organizations, to recognize and align with what matters most. For personal…
How to Change the Energy of a Resistant Team
” allowfullscreen=”allowfullscreen”> Episode Summary In this episode of Mondays with Mike, host Mike Staver addresses the challenge of changing the energy within a team that persistently resists their leader’s suggestions. Mike uses a real-world approach, recommending that leaders foster open conversations rather than playing the authority card. He shares the importance of surfacing and addressing the root…
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